You Are Awesome

I've observed over the years that people usually become what those around them tell them they are. Men especially seem to become what the important women in their lives tell them they are.

I love that my husband's mother told him he was capable, honest, and smart, before his character was fully formed. That he could do his own dishes and laundry before he ever had. That he was a good cook when he made his first can of Campbells soup. I love that my daughters tell him he's a great dad and compete to get the first hug when he comes home from work, even though he thought he just wanted to crawl into bed. That he has strong shoulders when they want to be carried. I'm glad that I told him he was gentle, and kind, and hard working, when I could only see the promise of those things in his 21 year old character. He has become all those things and more.

It's so easy to see each other's flaws, but pointing them out doesn't help. It's harder to see the potential for greatness. Look hard, then call it out. Your words are powerful. Tell your husband what you see him becoming. Dont sit around with the gossipers complaining about your man. It's much more fun to tell his exploits. Use "I love it when you..." often in your conversations with him. My husband isn't great at buying gifts, but I'm not going to tell you about his failures. Instead of gifts he now writes love letters for birthdays, anniversaries, and holidays. Jealous yet?

You can't change other people, but you can change how you respond to them. Try, "you're so much better than what you just did. I know you're going to make that right." Try it with your kids. Tell me how it works out.